gosh i'm going to be deadmeat!

i've got deadlines coming in... i don't know if it's a good thing. might be. i hope. think. at least with all these things flooding me i don't think i'm in a position to feel sad or unhappy about the death of my grandmother at all.

i've got people asking me if i'm going back to singapore to attend the wake or something.
"i'm not sure."
"i don't know."
those are the usual replies i can muster up. if i do pop back to singapore for a few days, i'd still have to consult my parents. it _is_ their money i'm using to fly back and forth after all. but quite frankly i don't think any of that is possible. here's a short list of reasons (yes i like to make lists):-

1. i can't get an air ticket within short notice
2. if i do i'd probably be suckered for all i'm worth
   
3. my parents will probably ask me not to go back just like that
   
4. even if i do go back i can only pay my respect to my grandmother
5. i can visit her at the columbarium when i complete my course of studies
6. my parents would want me to settle my studies first
7. my grandmother would want me to do well too
8. i'd fall behind in my studies if i return
9. action costs more than inaction
10. there're deadlines due soon

so what deadlines are there? not a lot, but each is potent enough to burn plenty of my braincells:-

1. C programming due 29th Aug Monday - i totally suck at this subject, and i'm familiar with neither C nor C++. i'm doomed!!!
2. A 3000 word (max) essay due 25th Aug Thursday - it's actually on a security policy of my choice for an SME (or a university) within the Aussie context.
3. Programming this forum for my annual project due 1st Sept(or whenever we meet our client to show them) - frankly i'd been working the most on this. rather impractical of me i must admit. but it seems the most straightforward thing to do.

i probably should reset my priorities and work on the essay and C programming stuff first.

*apologies. i probably would have less time this coming week or so...*